What is the measure of success? Is it wealth? Is it fame? Is it position? What is it?
Look around you. People gauge your success on what they see physically, and what other people say is successful. Motivational speakers and life coaches talk about success based on their experience and what worked for them, and people follow them, expecting to end up with the same results. And when they don’t succeed in that path, they get discouraged.
Who really sets the standard of success? Who defines it?
I can say that I have a successful marriage, based on what my husband and I went through and how we started. Other couples may not consider what we have as a success based on their standards. What worked for us and how we got to the place where we are now may not work for other people. So, if I say that I have a successful marriage and others don’t think so, who is right?
Is it safe to say that success is subjective?
I believe so.
With this mindset, I can define success as being the person God created me to be and achieving the purpose that He has called me for. This means that I have my unique path that has its own standards of success. I then can’t compare myself to others.
We have a problem though.
We live in a society where people are becoming millionaires doing things that were not considered ‘successful means' years ago. We have the social media influencers, people flipping houses, bloggers, vloggers, and life coaches. Others look at them and want to be like them because their achievements look easier to attain. It then becomes more difficult not to compare yourself to that ‘nobody’ who became ‘somebody’ out of documenting his trips to Hawaii. How can you not wish to be that guy who flipped houses and made tons of money, and is now doing videos telling you that you too can do it?
It seems like everybody is telling you what to do and how to do it … because it worked for them. But will it work for you? Even if you attend seminars to sharpen your skills, if you’re not cut out for that line of work, it won’t work for you.
I’ve noticed this to be true as well for saving and managing finances. Some people are good in living frugally, pinching pennies, and putting all their money in the bank. Others are not designed this way and would rather risk their money for something bigger. You can’t tell the frugal person to consider a higher-risk investment, and you can’t tell a person who loves risks to save his money in a traditional way.
Going back to my definition of success as having your own unique path, it therefore follows that outside of your uniqueness, you will not be successful. You can follow what others are saying or copy what they are doing, but if you are working against who you were created to be, nothing will work successfully.
To be successful then is to first know who you are the way God created you to be.
In my Motivational Monday video, JUST DO YOU, I explained that who we really are is who we were the day God planted us in our mother’s womb. That pure child, uncontaminated by the evil things of this world is who you really are. If you want to know yourself deeply, find that child in you – who she wanted to be, what she wanted to become, what she enjoyed doing, what made her happy, etc.
The pure, innocent you and the person you have become are both parts of you.
Every experience you’ve had, even the things you don’t want to remember anymore, are all part of the purpose you were called for.
"Who can be more effective to help domestically abused women than those who have personally experienced abuse and have overcome? Who can be more influential to represent sexually abused children than those who have been through this painful and horrible experience themselves? Who can be more believable and credible talking against drug and alcohol abuse than those who have been there and defeated the addiction?"
Your experiences are there for others to benefit from.
Once you’ve gotten to know yourself better and have discovered your own uniqueness, you can then proceed to walk towards your own path of success. You can start building and using what you learn from others as guideposts, not as your blueprint because you have your own.
Remember that others are simply there to learn from.
Focus on who you are and what you are called for and do not be swayed to the left or right or be influenced by others to become somebody else.
I want to see you become SUCCESSFULLY YOU.
Watch my Motivational Monday video as a follow-up to this.
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